HappyHourHamburg

Bedford Cafe

Farlz — Tue, 03 Apr 2007 14:47:00 +0000

It was a pleasant Sunday afternoon when Simo called me. Hey, I’m going to be in the Schanze soon, do you want to catch up for a beer? What a nice, relaxing end to the weekend I thought, a beer or two at a near-by bar, talk a bit of shit and be in bed early to prepare for another week. Simo arrived at Bedford Cafe before me, and was already half-way through a beer when I arrived. Bad start I thought, I’m already playing catch-up. There was no point wasting any more time, so I quickly sat down at the bar and got a beer. Well it seemed that Simon was a little thirsty this afternoon, and soon he was ready for another beer. I finished mine off and grabbed another too. So there we are, sitting at the bar, having a few beers and talking shit. It all seemed to be going along quite nicely. I felt the urge to visit the toilet, I guess we’d put away a few beers by this stage. When I stood up off my stool, I realised that perhaps the alcohol was having an affect. I made my way down the stairs to the klo and relieved myself.

I returned to the bar to find an old Deutsche speaking with Simon. I was a little surprised, because at that stage he didn’t speak a word of German. Upon reclaiming my seat, I turned and said, “keeping out of trouble mate?”. When he heard this, the old guy spoke up, “Oh, so I suppose you don’t speak the right language.” So our group of two became three. We continued drinking beers and talking shit when who else but our elderly German friend suggests we get a round of tequila shots. Soon enough a girl sitting at the bar who’s date had not turned up had also joined in on the conversation, as well as the guy behind the bar. A few more rounds of tequila and beer, and it was time to go. Simo and I dragged ourselves out, grabbed a falafal and each went home. Next thing I knew, I woke up in bed fully clothed and late for work. At least this time I’d managed to shut the door to my apartment.

Bedford Cafe is in the heart of the Schanzenviertel, diagonally opposite the Haspa on the Schulterblatt. It is really more of a bar than a cafe, I can’t remember ever having eaten there. They do have reasonable coffees, but that isn’t the reason I frequent it. It is a friendly place where you can go and relax with a beer, they have plenty of outside tables in the summer, and you often get some cuties in there. On Friday and Saturday nights, it is usually standing room only. While it isn’t the place I tend to finish my nights, I often will start there. It is a good place to meet with friends, and people there are usually friendly and happy to share tables etc when it is busy, so making new friends there isn’t too hard either. Music is usually the choice of whoever is behind the bar, but nearly all have good taste.
Astra: 2€
Pros: Chilled, friendly, cheap beer.

Cons: Finding a seat can be hard on Friday and Sat nights, closes a bit too early (between 12 and 2 depending on the night)

Nachtlager

Farlz — Tue, 03 Apr 2007 11:52:35 +0000

I recall one night out on the Kiez during the summer, it was late (or early, depending on how one looks at these things). The crowds were getting thin. I had just left somewhere else (maybe Ex-sparr) with a mate of mine in search of something a little different. Perhaps some new sights, or new sounds, or new tastes. As we wandered along Hamburger Berg, something caught my attention, a sound, sailing gracefully through the air. Wait, I recognise that sound. Is it? No, it couldn’t be…yes, it is. Someone is playing Van Halen. Not just any Halen song either, but Jump. I was as excited as a fat man with a döner. For some reason, my mate wasn’t jumping around. I put it down to him being drunk, grabbed him by the shirt and dragged him with me into Nachtlager.

There were still a few in there, although it was only about 1/3 full. At this stage of an evening, one doesn’t expect to have a great selection of people. What you have generally are the scraps and those who are too drunk to know when to go home. The scraps, like that bit of food that fell off your fork and down the side of the couch, aren’t appetising, but hunger makes you do strange things. Looking around I had just about decided that no, I’m not that hungry, when I spotted something.

Dancing alone, she clearly knew how to move. Not just that, but she moved like she didn’t care who was watching. It was nice to watch and I told her so. To cut a long story short, she and a friend were out after finishing work for the night. They happened to be strippers (stripperin). We decided to go back to my friend’s house for a drink, stopping into an adult shop or two on the way to discuss various items for sale, past purchases and bits and pieces on the wish-list. I seem to be getting distracted from the main point of this review, Nachtlager, so I guess we might have to leave it there and get back on track.

I’ve been to Nachtlager a few times. It’s not too bad. It is another bar (kneipe)/club on Hamburger Berg. I find it a bit more low-key than Ex-sparr, but it is in a similar vein. There are couches to chill out on, a kickertisch and a reasonable sized dance floor. Music is a mix of pop and rock, more to the pop-end of the scale. It is busy on the weekends like the rest of the week, but generally pretty quiet on school nights.

Becks 2,70€

Pros: I like the couches, the back room arrangement with the kickertisch and the slightly funky vibe.

Cons: No Astra.

Ex-sparr

Farlz — Mon, 12 Mar 2007 12:33:45 +0000

Ex-sparr is a bar on Hamburgerberg; they sell drinks and play music; they used to have a big table you could dance on (but not anymore). I’m not sure how many times I’ve been into Ex-sparr, but I’d say it is anywhere between a lot and a shitload. Unfortunately, for one reason or another, I can’t remember too many details. This may have something to do with Ex-sparr’s close proximity to the Lucky Star (directly opposite) and my history of enthusiastic drinking. When you walk into Ex-spar, you walk into the main dance floor. The music is a mix of current pop tunes and some classic (80’s and 90’s) drunken bar songs. The crowd in front is usually pretty enthusiastic, with a lot of drunk people sporadically throwing limbs around like an epileptic. Not that I should judge other people’s dancing skills, people who live in glass houses and all. If you are really lucky, you might find yourself in Ex-sparr when someone requests Mystify by INXS. In former times, as soon as the first bars came on, a few repeat offenders would jump up on the table and lose their shirts. These days however, the table is gone, so the dance doesn’t quite have the impact it did. Now you may find the motley crew just on the dance floor, or climbing on various other parts of the bar to perform their remarkably sexy routine.
At the back, there is a smaller area with a kickertisch, some benches around the walls and the DJ booth. The crowd back here is usually much more chilled, although usually similarly intoxicated.
So we have a crowd that likes to party, is typically pretty well on the way when they arrive, and music that is easy and fun to dance to. There is usually a mix of looks, but the later it gets, the better everyone apears. Ex-sparr is usually still going pretty strong after 6, and there are heavy curtains on the windows blocking out that annoying sunlight. Because of that, it is seen as some as one of the better places to find some left-overs if you are still feeling horny at the end of the night.

Astra: 2,50€

Aurel

Woolli — Fri, 16 Feb 2007 20:43:41 +0000

Beim vorbeigehen sieht das Aurel, mit seine vermilion rote Außenwände und Teelicht Beleuchtung, ganz schon schraeg aus. Wenn man reinkommt ist es meistens so voll das nicht mal mein, sonst so zuverlaessigen, bösen blick jemanden einschuechtert mir sein Platz frei zu machen. Das Publikum geht ehe in die szenige richtung, was mich mit mein ausgewaschene wolfmother tshirt und baggy Jeans ein wenig fehl am Platz wirken lies.

Was das Aurel hoch anzurechnen ist, ist das sie jeden Tag bis 9pm Capi Happyhours haben… das bedeutet die Capis kosten nur 4€ anstatt 5.50€… Ich gestehe das es sich aufm ersten Blick nicht nach etwas besonderes anhört, aber nachdem ich vier Caipis getrunken hatte merkte ich wie das alkoholpegel im Blut Anstieg. Darauf hin habe ich bei der naechste runde aufgepasst, und als ich gesehen hab das der Caipi Glas mit Cachaça aufgefuellt wird wurde mir klar wieso ich diesem Abend etwas frueher abbrechen muesste….

Fazit: Finde ich zu voll um gemuehtlich zu sitzen, aber zu weinig los um zu feiern… aber die happy hour caipis kann man gut dafuer nutzen um ein abend vorzugluehen….

Thats Woolli

Woolli — Fri, 16 Feb 2007 18:17:29 +0000

Damit Ihr wisst wer sein leben, Gesundheit und verstand aufs Spiel setzt um die Hamburgerischen Kneipen auf begehbarkeit und qualitaet zu prueften stelle ich mich erstmal vor.

Ich komme aus der weite, weite ferne… da muss man ganz lange Richtung sueden gehen, und wenn ihr aufm kopf steht musst ihr euch einfach links halten. In diese einsamkeit bin ich zwischen gumtree und yabbie creek aufgewachsen. Der tages zeitung wurde ein mal der woche freihaus vom vorbeifahrende roadtrain geliefert. Es war alledings nie einfach das klein geschriebene durch das verschmierte fish’n'chips fett zu lesen. Trotz diese hindernis ist es mir immer wieder gelungen das kreuzwort raetzel zu loesen und nach zwei jaehrige Teilnahme ist es mir doch noch gelungen der hauptpreis zu gewinnen… Ein drei woechige urlaub in Hamburg…. naja das ist schon ein paar Jahre her…. und ich konnte wirklich nichts dafuer das ich mein rueckflug verpasste… ich hab der taxifahrer gesagt “take me to the f*cking planes”… er muss mich eben missverstanden haben weil er mich zur Reperbahn brachte…. und ihr koennt euch vorstellen das ich nicht so schnell wieder weg gekommen bin.

da wir hier in good old germany sind werde ich euch meine berichte in aussiedeutsch schreiben… da muesst ihr durch… und ich auch… ansonsten cheers und frohes trinken.

Lucky Star

Farlz — Fri, 16 Feb 2007 12:52:00 +0000

I once had a dream that I was a drinking machine, incredibly rich and really, really, ridiculously good-looking. I walked into a bar, challenged everyone to a drinking competition, bought a tray full of shots and proceeded to down them all.

So when I woke up, I wasn’t rich and I cannot drink a tray full of shots (you can take my word on that, but we’ve done studies), on the plus side I may be even better looking than I imagined. The closest I’ve found myself to living that dream was visiting the Lucky Star. It turns out, if shots are only 50 cents (Mexicanas) I can buy a whole tray, and because they aren’t too strong, I can drink a shit-load of them. I love it, it makes me feel like a big man.

If you went to the Lucky Star when it was empty, you would expect that at best, it would have a handful of old drunks in it on the weekend. However, on the weekend the bar is full of people and energy. There are those who settle in for the long-haul, and a constant stream of people coming in for a few cheap drinks before heading elsewhere in the Kiez. The crowd ranges from teenagers to middle aged, although mostly in their 20s, and in my experience there is always a good selection of attractive, friendly young ladies passing through.

The music is courtesy of a jukebox and depends on who has put their cash in. Often people choose shit songs, so we make a point of choosing a dozen or more that we approve of upon arriving. If you are bored, there is a dartboard, and of course there are many friendly drinkers in the bar with whom to converse. Most people are in there to get drunk and have fun, so the atmosphere is pretty relaxed.

During the week, the place is usually pretty empty, you need to bring your own party. Of course there was that one Monday night where I was propositioned by two cute seventeen year olds; (un)fortunately, thoughts of my girlfriend kept me on the moral high-ground.

Highs: Cheap drinks (beer and shots), friendly crowd, cool vibe, you might see me.

Lows: Not somewhere you would take a first date if you are trying to con him/her into thinking you are classy and sophisticated. For the most part empty in the week.

Astra: €1.70

Barbarabar

Farlz — Fri, 16 Feb 2007 12:51:23 +0000

“Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, something,” I slurred.
“Babarabar?”
“Yeah, that’s it. Come here, I’m fucked up. It’s good.”
Barbarabar is a funky little bar on Hamburgerberg. I like it there, I have fond memories of it. Unfortunately, those memories are little more than flashes in otherwise completely blacked out nights. I am able to recall one night I was in there, doing my best “I’m a cute foreigner” routine on one of the very attractive young ladies behind the bar. I’d love to fill you in on how suave and sexy I was, but I just can’t remember the details, so let’s just assume I was pretty bloody suave and sexy and move on. I can remember a few things though. I’m pretty sure I did keep my pants on the whole night (which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but I was hoping that someone would help me out of them at the end). I’m pretty sure I did crawl across the bar in a very sexy, panther-like manoeuvre. I’m pretty sure I did spend a a little while behind the bar serving drinks. And I know I did fail with the bartender, but I’m sure that was only because she had a boyfriend.
So, why do I like Barbarabar? It has cool furniture and decor, it is friendly, there’s often a nice view and it has a certain chilled vibe that I find attractive. They have a small dance floor, some chairs and bar stools and a kick-tisch. A small TV behind the bar plays skate/surf/snow vids. The compact size means that it feels fairly full even with not so many people in there. It is big enough that not everyone will see you as soon as you walk in, but you can do a lap pretty quickly. Busier than most during the week, Thursday nights especially, it is one of the best places to be on Hamburgerberg. Barbarabar certainly attracts it’s fair share of good looking singles, but it isn’t the meat market that some other places in the Kiez are. This is accentuated by the smaller size of the place, it doesn’t take too long before you’ve had a chance to check everyone out, and they’ve done the same to you.

Highs: Cool atmosphere, decor, friendly, cosy, kick-tisch.

Lows: Maybe too small for some, more somewhere to chill than go crazy.

Astra: € 2,50